Scared Shitless: Tasteful Toilet Humour-Horror Waits for the Shit to Hit the Fans.
By Thom Ernst
Rating: B+
Filmmaking can be a crapshoot. So, writer Brandon Cohen and director Vivieno Caldinelli decided to shoot a film about crap—well, sort of.
Their film is called Scared Shitless, which says all you need to know about the film’s premise and its intentions. An early title, Monster in the Toilet, had something of the same effect, but according to Cohen, Scared Shitless has a better flow. There’s no tiptoeing around its premise, no attempt to disguise its intentions.
No, Scared Shitless is exactly what the title promises, a plunge into the bowels of bathroom humour. And, surprisingly, it’s all done in good taste. Cohen’s script doesn’t get backed up with messy gags that would rather have you gagging than amused. Instead, it’s flushed with charm, warmth, and just enough horror to put you on the edge of your seat—or rather, put your seat on the edge.
Scared Shitless isn’t likely to be shortlisted for a Canadian Screen Award (although, who knows?), and I wouldn’t bet on a Criterion release any time soon (though stranger things have happened). But you don’t name your film Scared Shitless if prestige is what you’re after. Cohen and Caldenelli clearly don’t give a crap about prestige; they’re answering nature’s call for something offbeat and amusing.
This is a story that’s been brewing with Cohen for some time. The inspiration comes from the kind of anecdote you laugh at until you realize it’s not so far from your own experience. As a young man working construction, Cohen was terrified of using the portable washrooms after coworkers needled him with warnings about “critters” lurking in the dark, waiting for the chance to nip him in the butt.
Many would have laughed it off, then secretly, in the privacy of the porta-potty, checked for clearance. Cohen went one step further, imagining the worst-case scenario: a creature crawling up from the toilet bowl. It’s absurd, primal, and instantly relatable. That seed grew into his unconventional comedy-horror.
Directed with cheeky confidence by Caldenelli, Scared Shitless opens with a couple of recognizable Canadian faces—Julian Richings and Mark McKinney. But it really takes shape once the pipes in an apartment complex get backed up and the plumbers are called.
Enter Steven Ogg and Daniel Doheny as Don and Sonny, a father-and-son plumbing team. Don is the veteran, dedicated both to his trade and to his boy. Sonny is the reluctant heir to the throne, a germophobe still figuring out his place in the world.
As Sonny, Doheny may strike audiences as a fresh discovery, but he has already held his own in lead roles in Adventures in Public School (2017) and Drinkwater (2021). He deserves wider recognition, and Scared Shitless may be the tipping point. Ogg and Doheny make a perfect pair—their timing, their easy rapport, and their genuine affection for one another carry the film through its most outrageous moments. It helps that Don calls his boy “Sonny,” a detail that sounds like nothing but lands with unexpected warmth. In a genre where fathers are often fodder for punchlines, Don is a great dad, and Sonny is a good son. It’s a rarity that gives the film its heart. By the time they reach the ill-fated apartment complex, we’re already rooting for them.
And just when you think the film will ride entirely on Ogg and Doheny’s shoulders, along comes Patricia, the concierge, played by Chelsea Clark with sharp wit and just the right comic oomph. Add Marcia Bennett as Mrs. Applebaum, a lonely but gracious tenant who uses plumbing problems as excuses to invite people in for tea and biscuits, and you have a supporting cast that flushes out the humour without overloading the bowl. Mrs. Applebaum, serving tea while tenants are crushed, mauled, and devoured by a many-tentacled beast, is both hilarious and endearing.
Of course, a film called Scared Shitless can’t resist a few fart jokes. It would be dishonest if it didn’t. But what’s shocking is how endearing those jokes are. Caldenelli dumps more than toilet humour; he layers it with camp, gore, and a tenderness you never saw coming. The result is a horror-comedy that knows it’s ridiculous without losing sight of its characters.
The budget, rumoured to be modest, shows no signs of hampering the production. If anything, the limitations forced smarter decisions. The monster, a many-tentacled sewage-dweller, is convincing enough to be threatening, but silly enough to let audiences enjoy the lunacy. Nothing looks cheap; everything looks intentional. It’s the kind of resourcefulness that makes low-budget Canadian filmmaking so easy to root for.
In the end, Scared Shitless is that rare gross-out comedy that proves good filmmaking rises to the surface, even when the premise comes out of a toilet bowl. Cohen and Caldenelli have managed to turn a construction-site phobia into a tender, campy, crowd-pleasing romp. Scared Shitless deserves an audience, and it’s sure to once the shit hits the fans.
CLICK HERE to see Bonnie Laufer’s interview with Scared Shitless’s Mark McKinney.
Scared Shitless is directed by Vivieno Caldinelli and stars Stephen Ogg, Daniel Doheny, Chelsea Clark, Marcia Bennett, Julian Richings and Mark McKinney. Scared Shitless is currently available to stream on iTunes/Apple TV, Google/YouTube TV, Amazon, and Major Cable platforms.